


You Promised

by WolfBeils



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuuin no Tsurugi | Fire Emblem: Binding Blade
Genre: Gen, Grief/Mourning, Headcanon, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-11-13
Packaged: 2020-12-13 20:23:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21003632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfBeils/pseuds/WolfBeils
Summary: Promises made, yet now unkept.





	1. He's Dead

**Author's Note:**

> Yes this is loosely inspired by Hector and Lilina's FEH conversation within the new Halloween alt.  
Yes this is probably half assed a little.  
Yes this is going to be a two chapter thing.  
Yes I thankfully know what I'm doing for next chapter.

On nights where she felt low before, she'd have one type of nightmare. It was a general theme that all of them were based on an idea that she'd have a growing anxiety about when word of a slowly growing war was coming out. Before the war, those nightmares grew more frequent because of that deterring mood over the sheer anxiety. They were like broken pieces that even someone as smart as herself couldn't piece together even if she tried and tried- pondered and pondered.

Sometimes she told Roy about them. About seldom seeing "a giant with a great beard" bleeding out on a cold stone floor. Yet the eyes she saw it through didn't feel like hers. She never told Hector about it, fearing that the man imaged is him. She'd sometimes talk to Eliwood about it and he'd worry intensely. The children could even see how much concern was on his face, yet old Marquess Pherae wouldn't act on it. He'd dismiss his worries inside, telling her it's just a dream. Nine times out of ten, she'd believe her father's closest friend and father of her own closest friend. But she just couldn't believe him. The possible reason they happened is far too convenient.

The nightmares were a thing she always bottled up in Ostia. Not feeling able to tell Hector hurt. But hey, a comfort hug in the morning isn't so bad, is it? She doesn't have to detail it and she gets that warm embrace she could stay within forever.

If only it could be forever… 

* * *

Lilina was relieved to see Roy again through and through. Though she very quickly lost sight of that when he told her the news. The girl lost sight of everything. It hit her like a direct arrow from a ballista. This relieving meeting suddenly became a broken promise- a living nightmare.

Being locked in a room was stressful enough. This is just worse. She cried, but forced a lot of tears back for she knew where to go next. Just like her father told if… this happened. Go to the secret cave nearby, and retrieve Durandal.

And once they did that, there was some form of downtime. Some downtime that Lilina took advantage of, sneaking off from camp to be alone. Roy saw her go off but he knew well she needed to be alone- and away from people. Even if he didn't want to let her go off on her own in these times, he couldn't bear to hear her heavy sobs that he knew would ensue. He couldn't bring himself to go after her and endure the heartbreak of listening to it. Besides, he's the leader of this army. The leader needs to be there. He just prayed she'll be at least a little alright and coming back soon. 

Lilina had found herself as far from camp as he she deemed safe enough to be. Not too far, but far enough to where no one from there can hear any sort of breakdown. She sat down, back to a tree. As she did, those broken promises… Words that seemed so hopeful- so optimistic…

("I won't leave you- not anytime soon.")

That was a lie. What's he done now? That first lot of words alone made tears form. They flowed down so fast and in such great amount. She started to sob- and sob. She even remembered the time she nearly cried when he gave her the idea that he's dying without meaning to. Yet this time there's no father to comfort her from that thou-

Wait, no, it's real.

There is no father.

Now who does she have? She doesn't know who she has. It feels like she has no one now that he's gone. No playmate. No designated hugger. No bedtime story reader.

Who can do all of that- or any of that besides her father?

("It will be a long time before you have to take the lead.

You will have grown, married… and I will be a grandfather, surely…")

Lies. More lies. Those words gave her even more tears. Where's the truth in them? 

More tears flowed. She started to wail from the grief. Audible, painful wails. It's all she felt she could do. Just sit there and cry while her father's now empty promises echo around her head in that voice she loved to hear. That voice is no more too. Now where's she getting any comfort?

She's still in her teens.

She isn't married.

She has no kids.

He isn't a grandfather…

…he's dead.


	2. He's Alive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's still here.

People always told her that time heals wounds. And who was she to not believe these people that told her so? Roy, Marcus, Wolt, Bors, Gwendolyn, Astolfo. The people of whom she cared about the most in the whole army. Others told her so too. Ogier- even Gonzalez in his own meaningful way.

The wound wasn't healing though. Not by much anyway. She'd still cry sometimes and feel a false sickness in her stomach every time someone mentioned her late father. It's understandable that his death would be talked about for a while, but she didn't want that.

She didn't want to hear all this "Lord Hector is dead?" and "If only Lord Hector were here…" nonsense. She wanted none of it to enter her ears. Every mention of him just made thoughts flood back. His empty promises that seemed so hopeful and full of great prospect. That he'd be there for as long as he can- and that she'd be a mother, and have a husband by the time it's her turn to lead.

And once this war is over, it  _ is _ her turn. No time to get ready or anything at all. She has to go straight into it as if it were nothing. And how is she going to do that when the moment she set foot in Ostia, what were  _ supposed _ to be her own soldiers turned again her. That didn't help things at all. It made her feel so powerless. How is she to rule as well as Hector did if her soldiers turn against her like that? It beats her, that's for sure. 

She could get all the reassuring in the world from those friends. Every bit of support. Every kind word in the dictionary. Every little ounce of positivity they had. And she still would feel like nothing. Not good enough, not smart enough, not strong enough. Not  _ anything _ enough.

* * *

Night time in her tent always gave her a good chance to think. Some nice quiet time to wind down from the battles and just sit there until sleep will claim her.

Though this night, she heard footsteps on the grass. It's not late by any means but still- why would anyone want to see her?  _ Does _ anyone want to see her? 

The footsteps got louder and suddenly a voice became heard.

"Lady Lilina, if I may come in? I wish to speak with you."

Marcus.

His company can't be bad, can it? She'll let him in. It's Marcus after all. Can't go wrong with him.

"Yes, Marcus. You can come in." she called.

The senior knight would follow that call, carefully uncovering the entrance and making his way in.

Something Lilina or Marcus didn't know is that Roy is standing out nearby, ready to listen in. Marcus suggested he tell Lilina of her father's similar struggles that she is about to go on. It's almost half because he wants to hear these things about the man he considered a second father. But mainly because of his sheer amount of worry for the girl.

Back in the tend, Lilina looked up at inquisitively. 

"What do you want, Marcus?" she asked.

"If it is alright, I wish to tell you some things about your father that you ought to know. Things Lord Eliwood often spoke of about him regarding his rulership.

May I?"

Already, her heart sank at the mere allusion to Hector. She fidgeted with her fingers for some moments, taking a deep breath before speaking. So much as it pained her to hear anything about him, she's interested. She couldn't quite speak a word given how she felt in the moment. So she nodded at Marcus.

"Very well. I am sure you are aware that you two were the only ones left within your bloodline, correct?" 

Once more, she nodded. Not really the prettiest thing for her to be reminded of, especially given she's now the  _ only _ one left.

"I know not if relating to him will help but… Lord Eliwood told me that Lord Hector was once in the same position as you are now- no family left, and a sudden impending rulership. I didn't know your father all too well outside of his… devilish young years, but I am willing to wager he too felt the ways you do."

Saying these things to her gave Marcus a small ounce of nervousness. The uncertainty of how she'd react ate at his facial expression somewhat, making it a little sad rather than his usual stoic stoney face. He just had to hope that Lilina would react at the very least a little well.

Meanwhile Lilina… felt confused. It seemed impossible to her that her father would feel anything that may equate to weakness- or vulnerability. He's her big strong father, there for her, and ready to do anything for her. It seemed so barbaric that he ever had a moment of weakness.

But sometimes when you look up to someone, it sometimes becomes hard to come to terms that they too have had moments of vulnerability. Becomes hard to realise that they too are human- not superhuman.

She nodded again- enough signal for Marcus to carry on.

"You're aware of your late uncle, are you not? How he passed some while before you ever existed." the knight inquired.

Lilina nodded.

"The man passed whilst your late father was in war himself. That left him in a similar situation as you… no family- and a ruling duty coming too soon…"

Despite him not being the most involved with Hector, let alone Lilina, it broke his heart to say these things. No one should have to go through the pain the two of them have gone through. No one deserves to lose something so dear to them and brought subsequent anxiety after. Marcus never truly expressed it to either, but the way life treated both breaks his heart a lot. Even if because of how close Eliwood and Roy are to both.

The man sighed before continuing. He tried to make these next words run into some more optimistic things, like he intended this talk to he.

"And your father kept on. Despite the people not trusting him at first due to his… reputation, he kept on and became the great man he was. I imagine there was a lot of turmoil and anxiety, but he managed and became the head of the league- just like you will be."

With the spark of optimism in those words, he cracked a faint smile.

"Lady Lilina, I know that you do not like hearing of your father these days. And I know that I am not the most involved with you, but if your father can get through, so can you. I for one believe that to be so, and I'd think Lord Roy does too, more than anyone here.

Perhaps you don't look as strong as him, but you have just as strong a heart as he did. A heart of solid refined gold, tough as the armour he wore, and as good as a heart can be.

Just know that… he would be proud up there to see you bloom like he did. Lord Eliwood always told these things with utmost regard.

He went against odds, crafted his own paths. And through that, he crafted a family of his own despite losing the very little of it he had before.

You can do the same."

This was mostly news to her. Things he never told her. Well… in this case- never had the  _ chance _ to tell her. Can she do it though? She… didn’t know what to think. Seemed as though these new things about him and the ‘lies’ he told her are having a battle in that head of hers.

“I am… sure he would believe in you, Lady Lilina…”

That got her. Those words. She went dead silent, dead still. For some moments, it looked as though the girl went totally numb- petrified even. It worried Marcus- a small bit of fear crept onto his face, his mouth very faintly gaping and his eyes filling with that tinge of fear. Did he say something wrong? Did he…?

...A sniffle.

Another one.

Tears started to well up in Lilina’s eyes, her brain replaying memories- good ones.

( “I promised to show him how to study.”

“Is that so? Well, that’s great, Lilina. Just what I’d expect from the daughter of Marquess Ostia!

Keep it up, and you’ll be head of the Lycian League in no time!” )

( “So, if anything bad happens to your dear old dad, I’ll be counting on you.” )

( “When that time does finally come, it’ll all be up to you.

So, keep working hard, Lilina- it’ll serve you well in the future.”

“Alright, father. I’ll do my best!” )

Perhaps…

“He… does believe in me…” she said, choked up yet there was a trace of optimism in her tone of voice- even if faint.

He does believe in her, always. And she  _ will _ try and lead Ostia in his stead. After all, she didn’t study for naught. None of what she did is for naught- she knew that some day, she’s to success Hector.

All this time, she had been focusing on that supposed lie he told her- that it’d be a long time. She never focused on the fact that even in death, he’s still there, and he believes in her. The tears continued to flow, but she let out a weak smile at Marcus.

“I must do this… for him, and everyone, Sir Marcus. There’s no one else who can do it but me. If he could do it… maybe I can too.”

The knight’s doubts were washed away with those words, and that smile. He himself smiled at her a little, pleased at partially himself but very much more so at the girl’s upliftedness.

Outside the tent, Roy heard it all. He couldn’t help but shed a couple tears out there, hearing Lilina’s will potentially renewed. He couldn’t help it- hearing his best friend, maybe even potential partner, strong once more. He always knew her as that strong, supportive girl. It’s safe to say she’s back again for the most part. Maybe it’ll take a little more to get her strength fully back, but she’s coming back it seems. No more mourning. 

Lilina would speak again, choked up- but the words still meant something.

“H-he believes in me…”

The girl took a deep breath, placing a hand to her chest- where that special organ is.

“He’s right here.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna quickly elaborate on the nightmares.
> 
> Whilst starting to write this, I had the idea of her having the same sort of thing as Hector, could have, but more geared towards nightmares. Similar to how Hector has dreams that insinuate the future scarily clear, Lilina has nightmares that very heavily insinuate that Hector is going to die sooner than she thinks.
> 
> These nightmares don't happen often but when they do, it leaves her quite upset when waking up. As stated in the work, the nightmares are like a broken puzzle. Sometimes she'll see herself crying in a corner or crying like she was there. Or sometimes she may even see Hector bleeding out just like Roy does.
> 
> So yeah, just a cool little HC I thought of when starting this little thing off. Like an opposite of the idea that Hector having prophetic DREAMS (although I imagine Hector may have nightmares himself leading up to his eventual death). Hers are consistently NIGHTMARES and probably increase in frequency as word of war starts to go around more.


End file.
